Slowing down

God has been slowing me down quite a bit lately. I'm still extremely busy and the next couple of months are going to be intense for numerous reasons. But being busy and God slowing me down go hand in hand. I feel it's something that we all wrestle with. How do I spend time with God when all I seem to be doing is filling up my calendar with meetings, gatherings, and daily life stuff? God has a sense of humor in my life and has cleared a lot of time for me to just not have anything on my schedule during the day. So usually this is the time where my mind plays mind games on myself and I sort of beat myself up with my fears...specifically Eugene. "Be still and know that I am God" has been on my heart. I'm not still. Rarely am I still, ever. Ask the people that know me. But I am finding incredible joy and peace during the times where I am still and align my heart with God. I don't know what is going to happen to me in the future, or what I will be doing, or anything that I think matters, but I do know that what I experience in the still times is what makes me want to live my life with God and people wherever He leads me. I'm desiring that cry in my heart that yearns for the couple of minutes of stillness to worship God. "God's joy is my strength!" I don't know how else to explain that one, but I'm being transformed to understand that more and more everyday. And that's my prayer for the people I am surrounded by daily. That God's joy will be our strength. My identity, my strength, comes from God. And I find I don't get that through other people, even though I wish that could happen, because I only get disappointed. Those couple of thoughts are just what I'm been processing and struggling with during the past couple of days...